你的mac 会唱歌吗？

osascript -e 'say "oh This is a silly song silly song silly song this is the silliest song ive ever ever heard So why keep you listening listening listening while you are supposed to work to work to work to work its because i hate my job hate my job hate my job its because i hate my job more than anything else No its because youve no life youve no life youve no life and you better go get one after forwarding this crap" using "cellos"'

复制上面文字 在终端中粘贴   回车  然后就唱歌了

八扇屏 文本 （28扇）

1、小孩子  

大宋朝文彦博，幼儿倒有灌穴浮球之智。司马文公，倒有破瓮救儿之谋。汉孔融，四岁让梨，懂得谦逊之礼。十三郎五岁朝天，唐刘晏七岁举翰林，汉黄香九岁温席 奉亲。秦甘罗一十二岁身为宰相。吴周瑜七岁学文，九岁习武，一十三岁官拜水军都督，执掌六郡八十一州之兵权，施苦肉，献连环，祭东风，借雕翎，火烧战船， 使曹操望风鼠窜，险些命丧江南。虽有卧龙、凤雏之相帮，那周瑜也算小孩子当中之魁首。  

2、粗鲁人  

唐朝有一位粗鲁人。此人复姓尉迟，单字名恭，号敬德，保定山后刘伍州。日抢三关，夜夺八寨。自秦王，夜探白壁关，敬德月下赶秦王，打三鞭，还两锏，马跳红 泥涧。自降唐以来，征南大战王世充，扫北收服皮克能。跨海征东，月下访白袍。唐王得胜，班师回朝。那尉迟恭，因救白袍，在午门外拳打皇叔李道宗，打掉门牙 二齿。唐王大怒，贬至田庄。到后来，白袍访敬德，那尉迟恭独坐船头垂钓，忽听得，身背后人又喊，马又叫。我乃征东薛平辽，特地前来访故交，你我金殿去交 旨，保你为官永在朝。敬德言到，将军不要错认，我乃山野村夫，耕种锄刨，一粗鲁人也。  

3、浑人  

秦始皇命王翦兵吞六国，在夜间偶得一兆，梦见黑娃娃白娃娃双夺日月，惊醒后心中甚是忐忑不安，恐怕江山落于他人之手。遂下旨意，南修五岭，西建阿房，东开 大海，北造万里长城，以防匈奴。不想江山传至二世胡亥之手，就有楚汉相争之事。鸿门宴刘邦赴会，项伯、项庄拔剑助舞。多亏大将樊哙，保走刘邦。楚、汉两路 进兵，以咸阳为定，先进咸阳为君，后到咸阳称臣。此时有一人姓韩名信，投到霸王帐下，霸王只以执戟郎授之。后来张良卖剑访韩信，告诉他，你必须弃楚投汉， 方能大鹏展翅。于是韩信投奔刘邦，果然登台拜帅，明修战道，暗渡陈仓，智取三关，在九里山前，设下十面埋伏计，困住楚霸王。前面有乌江拦路，后面韩信追兵 甚紧。霸王正在危急之中，只见江面飘飘来一打渔小舟。霸王点手唤之：“渔家！将某渡过江去，我有白银相赠。”渔家闻听，抱拳当胸：“你那里枪沉马大，我这 里渔船窄小，渡人难渡枪马，渡枪马难以渡人。”霸王闻听笑道：“哈哈…，那有何难，先将某家枪马渡过，再渡某家不迟。”说话之时，小船拢岸，渔家将枪支搭 在船上，马匹牵至舟中，船篙一支，船离江岸，直奔江心。渔家高声喝道：“呔，霸王项羽听真：休拿某家当一打渔之人，我乃韩元帅帐下大将吕天成是也。今日奉 了我家元帅之命，在此等候于你，所谓骗取你的枪马，你虽有恨天无把恨地无环拔山之力，掌中无枪，胯下无马，如失手足，难道你要死在韩元帅刀下？还不拔剑自 刎，等待何时？”霸王闻听，顿足捶胸，拔剑在手：“想当初悔不听亚父范增之言，今日果有此败，我有何面目去见江东父老，看来我真乃一浑人也。”

4、莽撞人  

后汉三国，有一位莽撞人。自从桃园三结义以来，大爷姓刘名备字玄德，家住大树楼桑。二弟姓关名羽字云长，家住山西蒲州解梁县。三弟姓张名飞字翼德，家住涿 州范阳郡。后续四弟，姓赵名云字子龙，家住真定府常山县，百战百胜，后称为常胜将军。只皆因长坂坡前，一场鏖战。那赵云，单枪匹马，闯入曹营。砍倒大蠹两 杆，夺槊三条。马落陷坑，堪堪废命。曹孟德，在山头之上，见一穿白小将，白盔白甲白旗靠，坐骑白龙马，手使亮银枪，实乃一员勇将。心想，我若收服此将，何 愁大事不成，心中就有爱将之意。暗中有徐庶保护赵云，徐庶进得曹营，一语未发。今日一见赵将军马落陷坑，堪堪废命，口尊丞相，莫非有爱将之意？曹操言道， 正是。徐庶言道，何不收留此将。曹操急忙传令，令出山摇动，三军听分明，我要活赵云，不要死子龙。倘有一兵一将伤损赵将军之性命，八十三万人马，五十一员 战将，与他一人抵命。众将闻听，不敢前进，只有后退。赵云一仗怀揣幼主。二仗常胜将军之特勇。杀了个七进七出，这才闯出重围。曹操一见，这样勇将，焉能放 走。在后面紧紧追赶。追至到当阳桥前，张飞赶到，高叫四弟不必惊慌，某家在此，料也无妨！让过赵云的人马，曹操赶到，不见赵云，见一黑脸大汉，立于桥上。 曹操忙问夏侯憞，这黑脸大汉，他是何人？夏侯憞言道，此乃是张飞，一莽撞人。曹操闻听，大吃一惊。想当初关公在白马坡斩颜良之时曾对某家言道，他有一结拜 三弟，姓张名飞字翼德，在百万军中，能取上将之首级如探囊取物，反掌观纹一般。今日一见，果然英勇，撤去某家青罗伞盖，观一观莽撞人的武艺如何？青罗伞盖 撤下，只见张飞豹头环眼，面如润铁，黑中透亮，亮中透黑。颏下扎里扎沙一部黑钢髯，犹如钢针，恰似铁线。头戴镔铁盔，二龙斗宝，朱缨飘洒，上嵌八宝云罗伞 盖，花冠云长。身披锁子大叶连环甲，内衬皂罗袍。足蹬虎头战靴，跨下马，万里烟云兽，手使丈八蛇矛。站在桥头之上，咬牙切齿，捶胸愤恨。大骂，曹操听真， 呔！今有你家张三爷在此，尔或攻，或战或进或退或争或斗。不攻不战不进不退不争不斗，尔乃匹夫之辈。大喊一声，曹兵吓退。大喊二声，顺水横流。大喊三声， 把当阳桥吓断。后人有诗赞之曰，长坂桥前救赵云，吓退曹操百万军，姓张名飞字翼德，万古留芳莽撞人。

（版本二）后汉灵帝之时，在涿州有一人姓张名飞字翼德。为人慷慨，禀性刚直，身高八尺，膀阔三停，面如润铁，浓眉环眼，声如巨雷，势如奔马。时年方十十 岁，恰黄巾作乱，国家挂榜招贤，张飞正欲投军之际，巧遇刘玄德，关云长。三人一见，义气相投，随在桃园结义。自结义以来，招募义兵，大破黄巾。到后来，讨 董卓、战吕布、失徐州、依袁术，败汝南，投刘表，兵屯新野，收徐庶，取樊城，徐元直走马荐诸葛，刘玄德三顾茅芦。卧龙出山，博望炖屯，夏侯十万大兵，片甲 不咽，与曹操结下仇恨。曹操带领八十三万人马，亲下江南，欲图报复。刘玄德因寡不敌众，乃弃新野，走樊城，且战且走。这一日，败至在当阳县，长坂桥前，只 有张飞一人殿后。张飞传令下去，随行二十余骑砍下树枝，拴在马毛之上，在树林之中来往奔驰，所为搅起尘土，故作疑兵。张三爷匹马单枪，桥头之上等候曹兵， 少时曹操带兵追到，见桥头之上只有张飞一人，后面树林之中尘土大作，疑有埋伏，不敢轻举妄动。传令压住阵脚。只见张飞圆睁环眼、厉声大喝曰：“我乃燕人张 翼德也，谁敢前来与我决一死战?”声如巨雷，曹军闻之，回顾左右曰：“昔日白马坡前，曾闻关公言道：‘张飞千军万马中取上将首级，如探取物。’今日相逢， 不可轻敌。”言还未尽，张飞又喝道：“燕人张翼此，谁敢来决死战？”曹操闻听，心中害怕，颇有退意。张飞遥见曹军阵脚移动。挺矛又喝曰：“尔等战又不战， 退又不退，是何道理?”喝声未绝，只吓得曹操身旁大将夏侯杰肝胆俱裂，坠马而死。曹操拨马便走，众将一拥而退，人如潮涌，马似山崩，自相践踏，死者不计其 数。后人有诗赞之曰：“长坂桥头杀所生，横枪立马眼圆睁，一声好似轰雷震，独退曹家百万兵。”张飞见曹军大退，不敢去追，传令随行二十余骑，摘去马尾松 枝，把坂桥拆断，回见玄德，述说以往。玄德叹曰：“贤弟勇则勇矣，可惜失于计算，那曹操素多好诈，汝今拆断桥梁，他知你无兵胆怯，势必卷土重来，彼率百万 之众，虽涉江汉，可填而渡，岂惧一桥之断耶?”张飞闻跌，后悔不及，顿足言道：“我真乃一莽撞人也！”

5、苦人  

在想当初，金宋交兵，扫南王番邦四太子完颜氏金兀术屡犯中原，统领雄兵数十万，战将千员与大宋朝精忠岳元帅汇兵于朱仙镇。那兀术连吃数十败仗，事出无奈才 将二世子完颜兀赫龙调在阵前，力分胜负。二世子只生得面白如玉，齿白唇红，头戴一顶虎头盔，身披大叶如意连环甲，内衬素罗袍，下配粉宽裤，足登虎头战靴， 坐骑白龙马，手使护手双枪一对，真是威风凛凛，杀气腾腾。由清晨战到黄昏，从黄昏又战到日末，只杀得金、银、铜、铁八大锤：狄雷、严成方、岳云、何元庆是 大败而归。岳飞闻到心中大怒，明日本帅亲自会他。话言未了，从左军参谋闪出一人，此人姓王名左字文成，朝上搭躬，口称：元帅，且息雷霆之怒，休发虎狼之 威，今日阵前小将非是兀术亲生之子，乃是我国明将之后。想当年，兀术大破陆安州之时，陆安州总镇姓陆名登字子敬，人称小诸葛。只因寡不敌众失落了城池，陆 老爷一家尽节而亡，那陆登遂拔剑自刎。气绝尸不倒，受了兀术三拜，许下他三件大事：抚养孤儿，不伤子民，与他夫妻并葬。尸身这才倒落尘埃，乳娘抱定孤儿进 了军营，兀术就把孤儿认为亲生之子抚养成人，一十二岁请来白善人传习枪法学艺四年，练成双枪一对，盖世无双，人称神枪将。此将有万夫不当之勇，不可强战， 只可智取。要想收服此将却也不难，三计可成。岳飞言道：哪三计？左曰：、反奸、诈降、苦肉。元帅言道：恐怕画虎不成，反类其犬。王佐无语，微微后退。数日 后元帅并未升帐，王佐私打聚将鼓，故犯军规。元帅将他责打四十军棍，只打得是皮开肉绽，逐出帐外。王佐无奈，回到自己营中，将陆安州之图画了一张，藏在自 己发髻之中。右手持定宝剑，将自己左臂断下，偷出宋营，来到金营，见了兀术口称：郎主千岁！我家元帅不仁不义，劝他投降，不降不战，军法不严，无故将我责 打四十军棍，是他气恨不出，又将我左臂断下，使我无处投奔。闻听人言郎主千岁仁义过天，特来投奔郎主，情愿与郎主铡草喂马，充一小卒。兀术一见，惨不忍 睹，遂传下一令：我国金人听真，王佐所到之处不准阻拦于他。皆因他乃六根不全，一苦人。王佐在军营，住了数日，一日偶遇二世子完颜兀赫龙，世子遂指王佐问 兵卒曰：他是何人？兵卒言道：他乃宋营投降之人，名唤王佐，此人能讲南朝风俗故事，王佐遂给公子每日说书比古。 一日遇机，这才挂画献图，泄破陆安州机关。乳娘见图大放悲声，忙将公子叫在面前指图曰：说你本不是兀术亲生之子，乃是陆老爷之后，你父死在金人之手，你还 不替父报仇等待何时？公子闻听，顿足捶胸，立即大反军营，这一阵，杀得兀术是瓦卸兵消，皆是王佐之力。后人有诗赞之曰：洞庭王佐字文成，断臂说降陆文龙， 梨园常演朱仙镇，万古流传苦人名。

6、扁毛畜生（鸟）  

春秋时代，有一位公冶长老先生，乃孔夫子之门徒，能懂得百鸟之音。一日，闲暇无事，独坐凉亭。见池边落一大雁，青松之上落一小燕。小燕对大雁曰：“仁兄， 逍遥贵体，来此何干？”大雁只顾池边饮水，洋洋不睬。小燕怒曰：“人讲礼义为先，树讲枝叶为源，我拿好言对你，为何不理，莫非痴呆聋哑乎？”大雁曰：“树 高蝉声细，山高语音低，水深流去远，贵人话语迟。”小燕曰：“尔有何贵？想尔生在荒郊，长在蓬草之畔。昼游旷野，夜宿沙滩。项长嘴扁，足大身宽，鹅鸭不 像，岂不反乎！”大雁曰：“哦！那么，尔有何贵呢？”小燕曰：“想我，生在高楼大厦，长在凤阁龙台。闲观琴棋书画，闷有才女作伴。昼游花丛柳巷，夜宿纱纳 凉亭。”大雁曰：“那么，尔可晓得三纲五常？”小燕曰：“呃……这倒不知，愿闻其详。”大雁曰：“君为臣纲，父为子纲，夫为妻纲，此乃三纲。五常者，乃 仁、义、礼、智、信。见诸虫不吃为仁，见食不争为义，前后飞排为礼，不受人擒为智，春往秋来为信。父亡母不嫁，母亡父不娶，父母双亡，守孝三载。哪像尔 等，见诸虫就吃非仁，见食就争非义，前后乱窜非礼，受人擒捕非智，来去无时非信。父亡母嫁，母亡父娶，父母双亡，呼朋勾党，乱恋失群，真乃畜生也。”小燕 闻听，大叫三声，坠树而亡。大雁昂首展翅，腾空而去。公冶长老先生由感而发，提笔留诗一首：“燕雁池边语哗喧，各争礼义辨愚贤。大小俱是飞来鸟，愚者愚来 贤者贤。禽鸟尚且知礼义，为人能不孝当先。”看起来人而不如一鸟乎！  

7、糊涂人  

在想当初，元顺帝无道，普天下哀鸿遍野，民不聊生，为防苍生造反，大丞相陀陀定下一计，恩开武举，引诱各路英雄到京都夺取“状元印” ，使其自相残杀，再一网打尽。在武科场中，有一员好汉，安徽怀远人氏，世代务农，出身贫寒。自幼习武，相貌奇伟，猿臂善射，勇力绝人，他就是打虎将军常遇 春，比武打雷，连胜数人勇夺武状元。陀陀赐毒酒与常，被英雄识破，遂大反武科场，摔死金头王，撞死银头王，枪挑铜头王，鞭打铁头王，二十七座连营一马踏为 灰烬。众豪杰逃出京城，扯旗造反，常遇春扶保西吴贤王朱元璋，指挥义军，兵奔京城，一路上是攻无不取，战无不胜，斩关夺寨，势如破竹。此时节，能与朱元璋 抗衡者，惟有姑苏王张士诚，北汉王陈友谅，三方成鼎足之势，张士诚与陈友谅为结盟好，定下儿女之亲，姑苏大殿下张仁过江认亲之时，为刘伯温所获，暗中定下 一计，命金陵名将巧嘴华云龙乔装改扮为姑苏殿下，过江认亲。华云龙来至九江，陈友谅满心欢喜，不料想，旁边惊动一人，此人年近六旬，须发银条，根根露肉， 条条透风，两道剑眉直插入鬓，一双俊眼，皂白分明。头戴帅盔，朱樱乱颤，内穿软甲，外罩大红袄，上绣蟒翻身龙探爪，海水江牙。左肋下挎着一口青锋宝剑，真 是不怒自威。此人乃九江大元帅，老将军张定边。张定边看破其中有诈，几次进言，陈友谅充耳不闻，反道老将军审时不清，辨事不明，泄私愤，官报私仇，真乃一 糊涂人也。到后来，陈友谅中华云龙之计，兵发玉山，起兵之时，那张定边头戴麻冠，身穿重孝，手拿哭丧棒，跪倒马前，是哀哀切切，陈友谅并不理睬，催马而 去。大队人马来至玉山，呛啷啷一棒铜锣响亮，四下里杀声震耳，九江人马死伤大半，陈友谅丢盔卸甲，遍体鳞伤，落荒而逃，逃至九江口，前有大江，后有追兵， “看孤王死于此处”，言还未尽，一叶扁舟，悄然而至，船头上昂首挺立，正是那赤胆忠心老将军张定边，口呼“我主不必惊慌，糊涂人特来接驾。”陈友谅顿足捶 胸，满面羞惭，“悔不听将军之语，到如今，国破家亡，前言在耳，孤有何面目重见故人，老将军哪里糊涂，分明是我北汉擎天白玉柱，架海紫金梁。”这正是：九 江口内摆大兵，偷梁换柱显奇能，扁舟一叶来救主，耿耿丹心老英雄。

8、江湖人  

在想当初，大宋朝有一江湖人，此人姓苗名训字广义，不遇之时，在洒金桥旁，摆下一座卦棚。巧遇未遇时的赵太祖打马比此经过，见桥旁人烟稠密，围着一座卦 棚。迎面有一副对联。上联写：“一笔如刀，劈开昆山分石玉，”下联配：“双瞳似电，观透苍海变鱼龙。”横批：“断事如见。”匡胤一见心中不悦：“何处狂 生，敢出此浪言大话？待我下马访之。”想罢翻身下马，将马拴在卦棚以外柳树之上，分开众人，走进卦棚，向先生躬身言道：“先生，你看某后当如何？”广义一 看，吃惊非常，原来是开国太祖！急忙站起，口称：“万岁，草民接驾来迟，望祈主公恕罪。”匡胤闻言，大吃一惊：“先生你莫非有疯癫之症？”广义言道：“我 主不必惊慌，看我主双眉带煞，二目有神，左肩头有一朱砂痣，后必有九五之尊。”匡胤闻言，心中暗想：“我左肩头有朱砂痣，他人怎能知晓？莫非到后来果应他 言。”想罢对先生低声言道：“某日后如登九五，当将你宣入朝中，封为护国军师。”广义谢恩。匡胤走出卦棚。向众人道：“列位听真，此人乃江湖人，江湖口， 江湖术士，不过奉承而已。”说完上马，奔他方而去。到后来，陈桥兵变，黄袍加身，果将广义宣进宫去，封为护国军师，执掌三军司令。到后来，湖北韩龙进来他 妹韩素梅，太祖酒醉桃花宫，带酒斩三弟，醒酒免去苗先生。广义去后，太祖后悔，说出：“可惜我那先生，他乃洒金桥旁卖卦之一江湖人也。”苗广义——江湖 人，你比得了吗?  

9、忠厚人  

后汉三国有一位忠厚人，此人姓鲁，名肃，字子敬。只皆因刘备当阳大败，夏口屯兵。鲁肃同孔明过江东，舌战群儒，对周瑜念《铜雀台赋》，言说曹操下江东所为 二乔，以乐晚景。气坏周公瑾，那周瑜才与曹操势不两立。阚泽下书，怒打黄盖，庞统献连环之计，周瑜用火攻。只皆因欠东风，周郎身染重病，南屏山借东风。周 瑜密差丁奉、徐盛去杀孔明。赵子龙箭射篷绳，孔明才得活命。火烧战船，曹兵大败，荆襄九郡，俱为刘备占领。到后来屡讨荆州，刘备总是不还，竟自难为鲁子 敬，那金圣叹老先生批三国说：“鲁子敬是一位忠厚人也。”

10、不是人（1）杨广  

隋王二世，次子杨广，杀父夺权，鸩兄图嫂，欺娘戏妹，宠奸臣，灭忠良，下扬州，观琼花。纳黍行舟，选来民间美女，赤体拉纤，船至中途，割断纤绳，使美女个 个跌倒，以博昏王一笑。到后来，狄去邪探地穴，棒打白利将，靠山王定计扬州夺印，雄阔海力托千斤闸，放走十八路反王，灭名山小罗成枪挑杨林，隋朝江山落在 宇文化及之手。这一日，炀帝病卧东宫，那无敌大将军带剑上殿，逼索玉玺，炀帝道：“朕何罪之有？”无敌大将军言道：“你这昏王，贪酒色，逆人伦，荒淫无 道，真乃不是人也。”  

11、不是人（2）曹操  

想当初后汉三国有位不是人，姓曹，名操，字孟德。自赤壁一败，行至华容道小道，忽听一棒铜锣，闪出一哨人马。当先一将；卧蚕眉，丹凤眼，胯下赤兔马，手持 青龙刀，乃圣贤关公也。曹操说：“我今狭路相逢，放我一命。”圣贤全其大义，放他一命。曹操在马上回思旧景：“想当初在我帐下，三日一小宴，五日一大宴， 上马金，下马银。到如今落得叫他放我一命，我真乃不是人也。201D

12、不是人（3）苏妲己  

想当初，商朝纣王七年春，这日早晨，有丞相商容见驾，高擎牙笏，山呼万岁，说：“明日乃三月事务，女娲娘娘圣诞之辰，请陛下驾临女娲宫降香。”纣王曰： “女娲有何公德，朕轻万乘而往降香？”商容奏曰：“女娲娘娘乃上古女神，生有圣德。那是共公氏头不触周山，因此，天顷西北，地险东南，女娲乃采五色石，炼 之以补青天，故有功于百姓。陛下当往行香。”王曰：“准卿奏章。”纣王还宫。旨意传出：次日纣王乘辇，随带两班文武，往女娲宫进香。但见此宫殿宇齐整，楼 阁丰隆，忽一阵风，卷起帐幔，现出女娲圣像，容貌瑞丽，瑞彩翩翩，国色天资，宛然如生。真是蕊宫仙子临凡，月殿嫦娥下世。纣王看罢自思：朕贵为天子，富有 四海，纵有三宫六院，并无有此艳色。遂命：“取文房四宝。”在行宫粉壁之上做诗一首，写的是：凤鸾宝帐景非常，尽是泥金巧样装。曲曲远山飞翠色，偏偏舞袖 映霞裳。梨花带雨争娇艳，芍药笼烟驰媚妆。但得妖娆能举动，取回长乐待君王。纣王写罢回宫。小女童禀报于女娲，女娲见诗句大怒！暗骂：好一个君淫隐兽！竟 敢在粉壁墙题诗，羞辱于我，打发山妖下山，混乱纣王天下。冀州侯苏护有一女儿，名唤妲己，有费仲、尤浑二人献了妲己的美人图，纣王命苏护进女纳为御妃，苏 护无奈下殿，在午门外题了反诗一首。“君坏臣纲，有败五常，冀州苏护，永不朝商！”辕门官见诗句禀报与纣王，纣王拍案大怒！派北伯侯崇侯虎追杀苏护，二人 在中途杀得是难解难分，有西伯侯与他二人说合，命苏护进女赎罪，路宿馆驿之中九尾妖狐吃了妲己，假冒妲己混进宫去，纣王纳下妲己，从此后昏君荒淫无道，不 理朝政一日在酒席宴前，妲己娘娘对纣王说：“妾身久闻西伯侯长子，善抚瑶琴，何不将他招进宫内抚瑶琴一曲？”纣王准奏。将伯邑考召进宫来，命伯邑考抚瑶琴 一曲，伯邑考抚得是如鱼纷飞，天花乱坠，妲己娘娘在帘笼以内见伯邑考长的是：美风姿，貌端庄，地阁圆天庭饱，口方正，两骨高，清而秀的一对眉毛，一双眸子 光耀耀，两耳垂肩，那一团足壮的精神在皮肉里包。 玉色锻，素罗袍，青圆领上边罩，腰中系灰色绦，打扮的好似淡而不艳，素里藏娇。妲己看的出神，便起歹心，随设下一计，欲留邑考，当即奏曰：“陛下可留邑考 在此，俟妾学精熟，早晚侍伴君王，以助圣上清暇一乐，岂不美哉？”纣王准奏，次日将伯邑考召进摘星楼，妲己娘娘赐伯邑考御宴一桌，伯邑考跪奏道：“犯臣之 子，焉敢讨宴？”妲己娘娘嫣然一笑，暗地送情：“你虽是犯臣之子，若论传琴，乃是师徒之道，即坐亦无妨。”妲己见伯邑考俯伏不言，不动心情，无计可施。则 令伯邑考平身，曰：“卿既坚持不饮，可依旧用心传琴于我。”伯邑考领旨，依旧抚琴。妲己猛曰：“我居于上，你在于下，所隔疏远，按弦多有错乱，甚是不便， 焉能一时得熟？”伯邑考曰：“久抚自精，娘娘不必性急。”妲己曰：“不是这等说，今夜不熟，明日圣上问我，我将何言相对？可将你移于上坐，我坐你怀内，你 拿着我双手拨此弦，不用一刻即熟，何劳多延日月哉！”伯邑考闻听此言大吃一惊！心中暗想：我命休矣！当时数落妲己娘娘几句：“你乃万姓之国母，如诸侯来 朝，岂不失了国家的体态？”妲己闻言，恼恨在心，暗骂：这等匹夫，轻人如此！我不杀你誓不为仙姑。次日又将伯邑考召进宫内，命伯邑考再抚瑶琴一曲，伯邑考 抚的是“愿王远色兮，再正纲常，天下太平兮，速废娘娘。妖氛灭兮，诸侯悦服，却邪淫兮，社稷安宁。陷邑考兮，不怕万死，绝妲己兮，史氏传扬！”抚罢，将瑶 琴照妲己打去，妲己娘娘假意倒在席前，纣王见此光景，拍案大怒！好一伯邑考，你竟敢进阁行刺！吩咐金瓜武士，将他拿下，妲己命左右，取钉四根，将伯邑考钉 了手足，剁成肉酱。到后来，贾氏妇人坠落而死，比干丞相摘心还胆，黄家父子反出了五关。一个苏妲己不是人，把纣王六百载的天下毁掉，你也比的了苏妲己吗

13、哮天犬  

南瞻部洲，北俱芦洲，东胜神州，西牛贺洲，傲来国正当中，花果高山水帘洞，有一块石头，分三百六十五度，按乾、坎、艮、震、巽、离、坤、兑、休、生、伤、 杜、景、死、惊、开。偶一日，红光崩现，刷拉拉从石内跳出一位美猴王。拜天拜地拜四方，拜的是菩提山菩提老祖。学的是九九悬空脚，驾筋斗云，蹿天入地，七 十二变。他也曾到过东洋大海，得到定海针如意金箍铁棒，只皆因大闹天宫，偷了蟠桃寿酒，外带十粒金丹，天兵、天将、金吒、木吒、哪吒、托塔天王诸天众神， 俱不能拿，二郎杨戬撒下哮天犬直奔美猴王腰节骨咬去。那行者在海眼之中取下绣花针，迎风一晃，扁担粗细当间，两头两道金箍，直奔哮天犬打去。直打得哮天犬 大叫数声，败阵而归。二郎杨戬一见，一棒未曾打上，说是：“真乃一条好狗。”

14、小工  

想当初，汤王推翻夏桀，定鼎中原，国号殷商，传至高宗武丁，时局动荡，百姓困苦。武丁即位，三年不理朝政，非是昏庸无能，实则从旁静观，暗思中兴良策，怎 耐终无良谋，缺乏贤能之士，忽一日，夜梦上天降下一位大贤，衣衫褴褛，满面尘垢，混迹于版筑劳工之中！次日上朝，命画工将梦中贤人之容貌，绘影成图，全国 张贴，又派人四下查访，终于在傅岩，版筑护路之劳工中发现傅说，请进京来，君臣对坐，真有相见恨晚之意！高宗武丁，不论出身，擢拔傅说为相，傅说丞相辅佐 商王，大力改革，三年之间，海清河晏，万民乐业，盛极一时，史称：武丁中兴。一代贤相傅说，起于版筑之间，就是个和泥刷浆的小工，你敢瞧不起？  
15、病人  

在想当初，隋帝杨广，弑父鸩兄，奸娘戏妹，下扬州，观琼花，平地挖河，搅的民不聊生，人神共愤，十八家反王，六十四路烟尘，共讨无道。到后来，天下归心， 李唐一统。都只为高丽国打来兵书战表，无端的要起战争，圣上命尉迟恭，老元戎挂帅征东。在山西绛州龙门县出了一家盖世英雄，名唤：薛礼，字表，仁贵，人 称：白袍将军。要为国家立功报效，投在军中，拨在张士贵手下听用，不料这张士贵乃是个心胸狭窄，疾贤妒能之辈，将薛礼，周青众家英雄派为火头军，不予重 用！薛仁贵虽然斩关夺寨，屡立奇功，不想全被张士贵冒认自己名下，可叹，大英雄，壮志难展，一日在山神庙仰天叹月，被尉迟老帅所惊，吓出病来！恰逢兵至独 木关，敌将安殿宝武艺超群，无人能敌，张士贵之子张志龙，女婿何宗宪均被安殿宝所擒，老贼张士贵，派遣差官传令薛仁贵出战，被周青，怒打差官，折断令箭， 老贼无奈，亲往薛礼营房拜求，薛将军不顾身染重病，提调本部军士，跨马摇戟，强打精神，讨敌骂阵！那敌将安殿宝见薛将军一脸病容，哪里放在心上，催马拧 枪，就战在一处。薛将军虽染病在身，虎威不减，抖擞精神，一声大喝，将安殿宝挑于马下！这白袍薛礼，病挑安殿宝！

16、死人  

在想当初，后汉三国，有一家贤人，复姓诸葛，名：亮，字：孔明，道号：卧龙！他本是山野隐士，自在闲人，只因徐元直走马相荐，刘皇叔风雪三顾，隆中一对， 打动卧龙，这才出山相助！自出草庐，火烧博望，威名大振，征南剿北，屡建奇功！后来，白帝城，先主爷龙归海葬，临危托孤，千斤重担先生一人承担。六出祁 山，鞠躬尽瘁。怎奈，日夜操劳，心神耗尽，又加之，司马懿老奸巨滑，坚守城池，拒不出战，大丞相又急又气，如雪加霜，眼见得病体沉重，灯枯油残！夜观天 象，见客星倍明，主星昏暗，知大限已到，想先帝重托未能实现，不由得珠泪飘零，大将姜维一旁言到：“丞相，何不祈星拜斗，哀求阳寿？”孔明言到：“只恐， 天意难违！但凭一片丹心，不知汉家可有再兴鸿运！”于是在营内草建法台，点起七盏明灯，外布七七四十九盏小灯，四面用军兵把守，任何人不得擅入。大丞相， 白昼理军务，夜晚踏罡斗，披发仗剑，祈天求寿，不觉七天限期将至，就要增寿一纪，不料被魏延闯入，扑灭灯火，前功尽弃！这也是天不兴汉，好可叹，五丈原 前，折断了这擎天白玉柱，架海紫金梁！八月二十三，天愁地惨，星斗无光，武乡侯奄然归天！  

却说老贼司马懿，夜观穹宇，见守将星三起三落，疑是孔明已死，命夏侯霸前去打探。不多时夏侯霸仓皇回令，言说：“蜀军尽退！”司马懿，顿足捶胸叫声：“快 追！”提调人马，亲率二子火速追赶，堪堪追至山脚密林之处，突然，一声号炮，杀声四起，众蜀兵回旗返鼓，杀将回来，树影中飘出一杆中军大旗，上写：“汉丞 相武乡侯诸葛亮”。又见高岗上众星捧月般拥出四轮车一辆，上坐一人，道骨仙风，头戴纶巾，手持羽扇，身披鹤氅，腰系皂绦，眉下二目炯炯放光，非是旁人正是 那耿耿忠心的诸葛孔明！又有姜维大吼一声：“司马老贼，尔中我丞相计也！”只吓的司马懿魂飞魄散，夺路而逃。一时间曹军大乱，人马相践，丢盔弃甲，抛矛撇 戟，被蜀军截杀一阵死伤无数！司马懿惊走五十余里，被夏侯霸、夏侯惠赶上，尤自双手抱头，口内言道：“我有头否！”喘息半晌，神色方定！待回到营中，差人 再行打探，方知孔明当真已死，所见者不过其木像也！司马懿，一声长叹：“吾能料其生，不能料起死也！”所谓“死诸葛惊走活仲达！”正是：五丈原前秋风寒， 卧龙英灵归上天。忠心耿耿留遗计，吓退司马保西川！

17、骂王郎  

后汉三国，诸葛亮一出祁山，计取三郡，兵临渭水之西，与魏军曹真两军相迎在祁山之前。王郎乘马而出，孔明自思曰：“王郎必下说词，吾当随机应之。”令小校 传曰：“汉丞相与司徒会话。”王朗纵马而出，孔明在车上拱手，王朗在马上欠身答礼，郎曰：“久闻公之大名，今幸一会！公既知天命，识时务何故兴此无名之 兵？”孔明曰就：“我奉诏讨贼，何谓无名？”郎曰：“天数有变，神器更易，而归有德之人，此自然之理也。”曩自桓灵以来，黄巾介乱，天下争横，降至初平、 建安之岁，董卓造逆，汜继虐，袁术僭号于寿春，袁绍称雄于邺上，刘表占据荆州，吕布虎吞徐郡，盗贼蜂起，奸雄鹰扬，社稷有累卵之危，有倒悬之急，我太祖武 皇帝扫清六合、席卷八荒，万姓倾心，四方仰德，非以权势取之，实天命所归也。我世祖文皇帝，神文圣武、以膺大统，应天合人，法尧禅舜，处中国以临万邦，岂 非天心人意乎！今公蕴大才，抱大器，自欲比于管乐，何乃强欲逆天理，背人情而行事耶？岂不闻古人云：‘顺天者昌，逆天者亡’，今我大魏带甲百万，良将千 员，谅你腐草之萤光，怎么及天心之皓月，公可倒戈卸甲来降，不失侯王之位，国安民乐，岂不美焉？”孔明在车上大笑曰：“吾以为汉朝元老大臣必有高论，岂期 出此鄙言。吾有一言，请君静听：昔日桓灵在世，汉室凌替，宦官酿祸，国乱岁迎新，四方扰攘。黄巾之后，董卓、汜等接踵而起，帝，残暴生灵。因庙堂之上，朽 木为官，殿陛之间，禽兽食禄。狼迹狗行之辈，衮衮当朝：奴颜婢膝之徒，纷纷秉政。以致社稷丘墟。苍生涂炭。吾素知汝所行：世居东海之滨，初举孝廉入仕，理 合匡君辅国，安汉兴刘。何期反助逆贼，同谋篡位，罪恶深重，天地不容。天下之人，肉。今幸天意不绝炎汉，昭烈皇帝继统西川，吾今奉嗣君之旨，兴师讨贼，汝 既为谄谀之徒，只可潜身缩着，苟图衣食，焉敢在行伍之前妄称天数耶？吾把你这皓首匹夫，苍须老贼，汝即日将归于九泉之下，何面目见二十四帝乎？老贼速退。 可叫反臣与吾共决胜负。”王朗听罢，气满胸膛，大叫一声，撞死于马下。后人有诗赞之曰：“兵马出西秦，雄才敌万人，轻摇三寸舌，骂死老奸臣。”诸葛亮骂王 朗，是你比王朗，是我比诸葛亮。

18、装疯卖傻之人  

想当初，列国之中，有一位装疯卖傻之人。那时节，周室衰微，诸侯割据，齐、楚、燕、韩、赵、魏、秦七雄争霸，天下刀兵四起。云梦山水帘洞有一位鬼谷仙师王 禅老祖，仙法神妙，道术高深。收下孙膑庞涓兄弟二人。那庞涓蝠耳鹰腮，隼面蛇行，外表忠厚而内藏奸诈，被鬼谷仙师赶下山去。孙膑留在高山之上陪伴师尊，看 守桃园。那一日，来了白猿偷桃，为的是堂前孝母，孙膑念他孝顺之情，将仙桃赠与白猿，白猿感谢孙膑之恩，送与孙膑天书三卷，孙膑参透天书，修成大道。后有 庞涓在魏国招为驸马，邀请孙膑下山共图大事。孙膑下得山来，哪知道庞涓暗设毒计，将孙膑双膝剜去，骗孙膑写出兵法十三篇。多亏那孙膑装疯卖傻，日食泥土粪 便，夜宿猪圈牛栏，整整三年，苦度光阴。多亏齐国大夫禽滑厘，用奇谋，施巧计，将孙膑救往齐国，齐王大喜，封孙膑为军师之职。孙膑执掌兵权，出征伐魏，将 庞涓杀了一个瓦解冰消。这一日，那庞涓逃至在马陵道前，见大树以上隐隐如有字迹，定睛观瞧，上写着“庞涓今日死于此树下”。庞涓大吃一惊，闪目望去，忽听 远处一棒铜锣响亮，闪出一乘战车，车上端坐一人，正是孙膑。但见他头戴九龙道冠，身穿八卦仙衣，腰系水火丝绦，往脸上看，面如冠玉，目似流星，鼻直口阔， 大耳垂轮，三缕墨髯胸前飘摆，说不尽的道骨仙风。孙膑一见庞涓，心中怒恼，晃动令旗，万箭齐发，将庞涓射死在马陵道前，报了深仇大恨，齐国声威大振，名震 于诸侯。后来孙膑羽化而去，位列仙班，流传在人间孙膑兵法一十三篇，那孙膑可称得起是古今中外第一装疯卖傻之人。  

19、畜类  

隋炀帝傍水行舟，行至在中途，忽见一穴，命狄去邪探地穴。忽见一处：似庙非庙，似府非府。庭前拴定一物：似禽非禽，似兽非兽。有一神人，手掌铜锤在那物身上打了一锤。次日，狄去邪上来，见隋炀帝身上着一瘩背，他乃猪婆龙一转，你敢比隋炀帝？  

20、愚人  

在列国时，卫国出现了一位愚人，此人姓宁名俞，人称武子。自从元角丧命，叔武被杀，元亘对狱，子虎旁听，庄子刖足，士荣斩首。而宁武子周时其奸不比奸险之奸，真乃大智若愚。孔子有云：“宁武子邦有道则知，邦无道则愚。其知可及也，其愚不可及也。”宁武子是个愚人。  

21、没这人  

在想当初，东胜神洲，有一块灵石受了日精月华，化作一只石猴。这猴子，寻仙访道，拜师菩提老祖，老祖赐名孙悟空，授业于灵台方寸山斜月三星洞，学艺八年， 习得七十二般变化，一个筋斗十万八千里，有通天彻地之能。那悟空，出师归山，在花果山水帘洞自号美猴王，闯龙宫、夺神针、下地府、打鬼判，将生死簿划个了 一塌糊涂。后受玉帝两度招安，上得天廷，偷仙果、盗金丹，大闹蟠桃宴。那玉帝急令天兵天将把猴子擒拿，那悟空，施展手段，甩开一万三千八百斤神铁是力战群 仙，战哪吒斗杨戬，拳打天王脚踢混元，直杀得五方揭谛、六丁六甲、二十八宿是盔歪甲斜不敢近前。多亏如来佛祖赶到，将猴子镇在五行山下春秋五百载。那悟 空，五百年后被三藏法师救出，从此保护唐僧西天取经。观音寺夺袈裟、碗子山斗黄袍，高老庄收八戒、流沙河降沙僧，三打白骨精、巧夺芭蕉扇，偷吃人参果、棒 打蜘蛛精。降服了金角银角、圣婴大王、六耳猕猴、黄眉老佛、九元灵圣、百眼魔君。师徒一行走到那狮驼国狮驼岭，又遇狮王、象王、鹏王三妖。悟空，不敌那大 鹏金翅雕，这才请出如来佛祖，降服妖魔。自混沌初分时，天开于子，地辟于丑，人生于寅，天地再交合，万物尽皆生。万物有走兽飞禽，走兽以麒麟为之长，飞禽 以凤凰为之长。那凤凰又得交合之气，乃生大鹏。佛祖收得大鹏，归奔西天。师徒四人这才得脱劫难，行至西天雷音寺，取得真经。那悟空，被封为斗战胜佛，受人 模拜。后人有诗赞之曰：一从大地起风雷，便有精生白骨堆。僧是愚氓犹可训，妖为鬼蜮必成灾。金猴奋起千钧棒，玉宇澄清万里埃。今日欢呼孙大圣，只缘妖雾又 重来。孙悟空，猴子，他不是人，你比得了吗？

22、小妇人  

在想当初，唐朝，有一位胖美女，此人姓杨名玉环字太真，只因唐明皇之子寿王李瑁选妃，杨玉环被召入宫，寿王一见大喜，即可纳为妃子，二人上殿面君，明皇一 见玉环花容月貌，真乃闭月羞花沉鱼落雁，体态丰盈面容娇好，胜似后宫粉黛三千，暗想朕身为君主，富有天下，却无这样美貌的妃子，若得玉环侍寝，我愿足矣。 回宫之后，明皇坐卧不宁神思不定，旁有高力士窥见，那高力士久在深宫，谙习万岁心思，心想我何不如此如此，必合万岁心意，忙问万岁，如此惆怅，莫非爱惜一 人。明皇道，正是，力士嘿嘿笑道，普天之下莫非王土，吾皇爱惜一人一物，皆可纳入囊中，又何必惆怅。明皇叹道，爱卿有所不知，吾所爱者，关乎人伦，若强取 之，岂不被天下耻笑。力士言道，万岁不必忧虑，某有一计，可遂万岁心愿。明皇忙问，何计。力士言道，岂不闻，明修栈道，暗度陈仓乎？明皇点头曰，好计，卿 真有栋梁之材。次日明皇口称龙体有恙，唤王道姑扶乩。王道姑言道，万岁此乃早年杀戮太重，以致上天见罚，须得有一皇族替万岁出家，上天方可宽宥，明皇乃召 寿王夫妻言道，须得玉环代朕出家，一可保寡人龙体康泰，二可见卿夫妻孝道，不容分说，命人与玉环换上道装，遣至道观出家。玉环出家三年，明皇暗与私通款 曲，三年后，玉环还俗，明皇不许寿王接玉环回府，自将玉环带入宫中，从此夜夜笙歌，不理朝政，天下大乱，后来安禄山造反，无人抵挡，明皇仓惶逃窜，逃至马 嵬坡，兵将哗变，逼死玉环。后人有诗叹之曰：玉环玉貌可倾城，明皇廉耻一旦空，禄山兵马压边界，一抔黄土葬娇容。这个胖妞儿你比得了吗？

23、个别另样的  

想当初，尧眉八彩，舜目重瞳，禹王手能反握，周文王胸生四乳，张太古头尖如笔，比尚书腹大如瓜，何平叔面如敷粉，刘要仲有五尺之髯，李老子怀胎八十一载， 张良有三寸不烂之舌，孔夫子七孔朝天，重耳并肋称为坝郡之君，汉刘备双手过膝，姜伯约胆大如卵，魏文长反骨不断，张翼德睡不瞑目，李元霸鼻息如雷，洪武帝 是猪嘴，楚霸王气贯长空，盘古至今，大圣、大贤、大忠、大奸，希奇古怪，个别另样的。  

24、气死人  

想当初，汉高祖提三尺剑斩白蛇，在芒砀山起义，创立汉室江山四百余年，至终业王莽篡位，刘秀走南阳复兴汉室江山，传至献帝是这才分为三国曹操据于北魏孙权 占据东吴，刘备据于西蜀。刘备驾前有一武乡候，此人复姓诸葛名亮，字孔明，道号卧龙，祖居古郡琅玡郡的人氏，后迁至卧龙岗。只因曹**后，曹丕篡位，曹丕 死后子曹睿继位。曹睿驾前有一大司马，领兵大都督，此人姓曹名真字子丹，建兴八年秋七月，带兵八十万入蜀平川，司马仲达为先行，行至陈仓界首，连遭阴雨四 十余日军将俱有怨言，那曹真无奈班师回朝。诸葛亮闻报连夜赶来，兵出祁山界口追击魏兵，两军对叠于渭水，那曹真身染重病不能理事，诸葛亮见曹真连日不战卧 病于床，随修书一封差小校送至曹真的营寨，那曹真扶病而起，拆书而视之，其书曰：“汉丞相武乡候诸葛亮致书于大司马曹子丹之前。切谓夫为将着能去能就，能 刚能柔，能进能退，能弱能强，不动如山岳，难知如阴阳，无穷如天地，充实如太仓，浩淼如四海，炫耀如三光，预知天文之旱涝，先识地理之平康，察阵势之期 会，揣敌人之短长，嗟尔无学后辈，上逆穹苍，助篡国之反贼，称帝号于洛阳；走残兵于斜谷，遭霖雨于陈仓。水陆困乏，人马猖狂。抛盈郊之戈甲，弃满地之刀 枪。都督心崩而胆裂，将军鼠窜而狼忙！无面见关中之父老，何颜如相府之厅堂！官吏秉笔而记录，百姓众口而传扬：仲达闻阵面惕惕，子丹望风而惶惶！吾军兵强 而马壮，大将虎奋以龙骧。扫秦川为平壤，荡魏国作丘荒！”曹真看罢大吼一声“气死我也”，口吐鲜血气绝而亡。后人提诗赞之曰：兵马出西川，致书曹子丹，堂 堂一员将，气死于帐前。曹子丹你比的了吗？  

25、渔人  

三皇治世，五帝为君，传到纣朝，出了一位渔人。此人姓姜，名尚，字子牙。道号飞熊。时不至，太公无时卖过面，算过卦。在渭水河边钓鱼，愿者上钩。文王夜得 一梦，梦见飞熊入帐，郊外打猎，必得贤臣。那一日文王郊外打猎，偶遇武吉拦路，将文王引至渭水河边，见一道长白发白须，真有仙风道骨之样。文王拉辇，太子 拉套，拉了八百单八步。到后来，扶保周朝八百零八年。斩将封神姜太公在此，诸神退位，斩将封神姜太公称为渔人。

26、乡下人  

在想当初，宋太祖赵匡胤陈桥兵变，黄袍加身，一杆蟠龙大棍打下大宋江山。太祖三下河东，与火山王杨衮在两军阵前走线铜锤换玉带，便有爱将之意。到后来，斧 声震地，烛影摇红，江山传于二弟赵光义之手，是为太宗。宋太宗再下河东，巧用反间计，招降杨衮之子杨继业，人称金刀杨无敌。八个儿子平定光辉德昭嗣顺，个 个是能征惯战。只皆因金沙滩双龙赴会，老令公杨继业率七郎八虎大闹幽州，杀的辽军是望风鼠串。可叹那奸臣潘仁美，私通北国，设下毒计，将杨七郎乱箭穿身。 老令公被困至在两狼山内，碰死李陵碑前。有杨景杨六郎闯出重围，进京告御状，朝中大臣，无人敢审。多亏八王千岁，在清官册中查访，访得山西霞谷县有一位老 西儿乡下人，此人姓寇名准字平仲，官居七品县令，清如水明如镜，足智多谋，审黄瓜问丝瓜打土地拷城隍，可称断案如神。自寇准进得京来，拳打潘娘娘，夜访八 王府，定下巧计在天齐庙假扮阴曹，审清潘杨案，太宗封为吏部双天官之职。到后来，辽邦摆下天门阵打来连环战表，朝中无人挂帅出征，寇老西儿背靴访帅，请出 杨六郎。老贼王强暗下毒手，要害杨景，寇准夜审白马，智擒王强。澶渊城下保着真宗御驾亲征，大破辽军，皆乃寇准之力也。后人有诗赞之曰：保国忠良寇平仲， 足智多谋显奇功。耿耿丹心为大宋，老西儿千古留美名。乡下人，老西儿寇准你比得了吗？  

27、酒鬼  

想当初，杜康老祖造美酒，刘伶醉酒整三年。屈原饮酒，慨叹世人皆醉我独醒，济公长老酒肉穿肠过，佛祖心中留；八仙醉酒蓬莱，大闹东海龙宫，曹操青梅煮酒， 论遍天下豪杰；关云长温酒斩华雄，苏东坡把酒问青天；鲁智深醉打山门，倒拔垂杨柳，武二郎拳打猛虎，大闹快活林；唐朝大诗人李白最爱饮酒，玄宗皇帝召进宫 中封为太白学士。有渤海国进来蛮书蛮表，要与大唐兵戎相见，满朝文武无人能识，玄宗皇帝大惊失色。多亏李白酒醉上殿，叫高力士脱靴，杨贵妃研墨，这才醉草 吓蛮书，保定大唐锦绣江山。杜甫有《饮中八仙歌》赞之曰：“李白斗酒诗百篇，长安市上酒家眠。天子呼来不上船，自称臣是酒中仙。”这几位酒鬼，你敢比哪一 位？  

28、蚊子  

别小看这蚊子，有诗赞曰：楼台殿阁随它进，三宫六院任闲游。有朝一日入宫去，敢与娘娘打对头——在娘娘腮帮子上它亲一口！能在花下死，它做鬼也风流！

How to Use Evernote as a Blogger (fwd)

A few weeks ago, I started using Evernote as my primary “blogging workbench.” It is where I store blog post ideas, collect various post components, and then write the post itself. This has proven to be a robust solution that enables me to be working on several posts simultaneously.

I thought I would share my workflow with you. Yours will be different, I’m sure. But, hopefully, this will provide you with a few ideas.

If you are just getting started with Evernote, I suggest that you buy Brett Kelly’s remarkably practical e-book, Evernote Essentials. It is worth setting aside a couple hours to work through this brief, 84-page book. It will save you DAYS of learning Evernote on your own.

My go through the following six steps in creating a new blog post.

1. Set up a blogging template in Evernote. There are certain components that I want to create or collect for every blog post. For example, I am now using the SCORRE™ method from the Dynamic Communicators Workshop (DCW) to prepare every post. This is an acronym for Subject, Central Theme, Objective Statement, Rationale, and Evaluation. I store my template in an Evernote notebook called Templates, along with numerous other templates I use on a regular basis.

   The template looks like this:

   

2. Create a new note for every blog post idea. Whenever I have a blog post idea, I go to my Template notebook, select my Blog Post Idea template, right click on it, and select Copy to Notebook. This puts a fresh copy of the template in my Blog notebook, complete with a “post ideas” tag. I then give the note title a unique name (the working title for the post) and then fill out as much of the not as I have the time and inclination to do. As a result, at any one time, I have dozens of post ideas in various stages of completion.
3. Assemble the various post components. When I get ready to really work on a blog post, I begin assembling the various pieces. I usually begin with the subject and the central theme. Then I add whatever is easiest to add first. It might be the relevant links, a few images, and then the objective statement. (I don’t have space in this post to go through what these elements are. If you want to learn the SCORRE™ method, I highly recommend DCW. You can get a $200 discount by using the special discount code: HYATTVAIL) Although it is primarily designed as a speech preparation tool for public speakers, it works equally well for bloggers.
4. Write your blog post in Evernote. I write the first draft of my post in in Evernote. i like having everything in one place. I don’t worry about formatting. I just try to get the post out, resisting the urge to edit my work as I am creating it. Once I have the first draft, I go back through and edit it. Once I have a stable draft that I am relatively happy with, I am done in Evernote.

   The completed note may look like this:

   

5. Copy your post to your blogging software. I select all the text in my post and copy it to MarsEdit, my blogging software of choice. This is where I add the metadata (i.e., post category, tags, and description). I also add all the formatting, including bold text, italics, lists, and other styling. I like a lot of control, so I personally work in HTML mode. However, this is not necessary for most bloggers. In fact, you could copy and paste your draft directly into WordPress.

   Here’s what blog post looks like in MarsEdit. Keep in mind that this is HTML code.

   

6. Schedule the post and review your work. When I am happy with my work, I edit the date I want the post to appear. I always schedule mine for 4:00 a.m. CDT. I then upload the post to WordPress. I then usually preview the post and review it on my site. The post isn’t live yet, but it gives me a chance to see the post in my blogging environment. I then proofread it a couple of more times and declare it done.

Evernote has enabled me to be more productive in my blogging. I love having one place where I can store everything.

世界末日——729新年抽疯大作

VERYCD上暴强悍的电影评论贴

近日verycd上发布了一部名为《拳皇（the king of fighters）》的最新电影，该电影
改编自几乎所有男生都玩过的同名街机格斗游戏。对于这种改编的电影，我通常是没有勇气去
观看的，但是这个资源里暴强评论却吸引了我，这个只有短短10楼的评论贴被其他网友评论为

“又是一个评论比电影好看的资源”
“完全是因为神奇的评论，我收藏了。。。”
“电驴的网友都是神.”等等等等。。。。

………………………………………………分割线…………………………………………………

1楼（lv_99）：有本事去改编俄罗斯方块！

2楼（spike11）：谁跟你说没有的，你的愿望实现了~~~~


http://v.youku.com/v_show/id_XNjU2NjM5OTY=.html




3楼（lightchen）：这个还真有啊，nb

4楼（saintic）：太假了，超级玛丽的应该没有吧

5楼（tsdandan）：你要的在这里


http://v.youku.com/v_show/id_XMTk4NTQxOTAw.html


6楼（wd3642025）：我不信还有魂斗罗的电影！

7楼（tsdandan）：别不信....



http://v.youku.com/v_show/id_XNjEyMjMzNDA=.html



8楼（ro123123）：终结吧！！我都信！！！我信！！！

9楼（qqzlyr）：我就不信有人敢改编〈吃豆子〉 ~！！！！！！！1

10楼（qqzlyr）：楼上的那位神仙 你别回复了 ，我自己已经找到了 《吃豆子》真人电影版本了`这个世界真的是变成了 “没有做不到 只有想不到的” 时代了

我是内牛满面啊``

http://v.youku.com/v_show/id_XMTYyNjQxNTYw.html

11楼：敢再来个《扫雷》吗？

12楼：你爽到了

http://v.youku.com/v_show/id_XNzI2Mzc3Mg==.html

(话说这个扫雷也不是一般的雷。。。）

Calculated and estimated national average IQ -- Wiki

That explains something...

Got new Macbook Pro 13, and love it!

Apple back to school sale rocks!

What to Buy at Walmart (by Catherine Holahan)

Despite (or perhaps because of) the fact that Walmart (WMT) is the nation’s largest retailer, there are plenty of people who wouldn’t be caught dead in one. To these folks, Walmart conjures images of a rapacious juggernaut of stadium-sized stores offering low-quality merchandise, spotty service, and mistreating employees and the environment — while driving small local retailers out of business.


But many of those misgivings are starting to fade, partly as a result of some well-timed improvements to the company’s product line-up and its environmental record. What’s more, there’s nothing like the worst recession in 80 years to nudge “low prices” a little higher on the collective priority list. And while Walmart may not be making its employees rich, the chain handed out very few pink slips in the downturn and remains the country’s largest private employer.

To be sure, there are plenty of reasons to remain wary of the retail behemoth. Whether you are concerned about the threat to a downtown business district, object to the retail culture, or just have a mental picture of the Walmart shopper that you can’t square with your own self image, it may not be for you. But it’s worth keeping in mind that, when it leverages its enormous scale for good, Walmart can make a difference in a hurry. It’s one thing when a boutique sells fair-trade coffee, but when Walmart gets into the game, a lot of sustainable farmers benefit. Here are five product categories where you can comparison shop in good conscience at the nation’s “low-price leader.”

1. Moderately Priced Consumer Electronics

Dying to get the latest hi-definition TV from Vizio or Viore? We thought not. Those low-priced brands are what Walmart has focused on in the past, but recently the retailer has expanded its offerings to include high-def TVs from top makers such as Samsung (SSNLF), Sony (SNE), Philips (PHG), and Sharp (SHCAY). It also now offers digital cameras made by the likes of Nikon and Canon.

Walmart still isn’t the best place to shop for a top-of-the-line television or digital SLR camera. But its focus on bringing in more big brands has made it an attractive option for shoppers seeking consumer electronics in the sub-$1,000 price range. This year, for example, some WalMart stores offered a 50-inch Samsung plasma television for less than $700 during the Thanksgiving holiday weekend.

What Walmart doesn’t have is an army of educated sales people ready to explain all the settings on the back of that SLR or the subtle differences between a high-def TV with a resolution of 1080i versus one with 1080p. But such service has become less important now that 90 percent of consumers turn to the Internet for detailed product reviews, says James Russo, Nielsen’s vice president of global consumer insights.

“Consumers will do their research outside the store,” says Russo. “So if Walmart has the right selection and price point, consumers will go there.

2. Smart Phones

In the past year, Walmart has beefed up its offerings of higher-end cell phones, especially Blackberries. This is good news if you’ve reached the end of your phone contract and are looking to compare new phones and carriers all in one place, since Walmart sells phones and service plans from each of the four largest U.S. carriers: Verizon (VZ), AT&T (T), Sprint (S), and T-Mobile (DT). So if you want to see how T-Mobile’s G1 phone, which uses Google’s Android operating system, matches up against Apple’s iPhone, Walmart is the place for you. You can’t do that at an AT&T store, or even at one of Apple’s fancy boutiques.


3. Coffee

While Walmart has been criticized in the past for being more concerned with price than environmental or labor issues when sourcing its goods, one area where it’s improving its record is with coffee. This year, the company partnered with TransFair USA, an independent certifying agency, to offer fair trade-certified coffee in its Walmart and Sam’s Club stores. The coffee is sustainably grown by farmers who receive a living wage and is thus more expensive than competing coffees — roughly $5.88 for a 10 to 12 ounce bag, compared with less than $5 for supermarket brand Eight O’Clock Coffee. But it tastes better (or at least it should), and by selling fair-trade coffee, Walmart vastly expands the market for such goods.

Carmen K. Iezzi, executive director of the Fair Trade Federation, a North American association for such products, says Walmart’s expansion of fair trade certified items like coffee was promising, although she cautioned that it’s too early to tell how much impact Walmart’s efforts will have. Still, coffee is a good start. “When any major corporation begins to move in the direction of more sustainable practices, that is a positive sign,” says Iezzi.

4. Video Game Bundles

Of course, Walmart’s primary appeal has always been its low prices, but it makes sense for shoppers to do a cost/benefit analysis: Is it worth it to save $10 on a book, when you could be supporting an independent bookseller instead? On the other hand, you can save a lot more money if you’re in the market for video game systems, which Walmart often bundles with starter games. For example, Walmart was recently selling the Xbox 360 Elite gaming system, along with two games, including this season’s blockbuster title, Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2, for just $259. The game console alone sells for upward of $249 at stores such as Sears, while Call of Duty typically retails for $60. And buying video game consoles and products at Walmart is arguably a guilt-free purchase. After all, Sears (SHLD) isn’t known for standing up against suburban sprawl.

5. Laundry Detergent

When it comes to the environment, Walmart’s suppliers have often fallen far short of best practices. Now the chain is trying to clean up its act by offering more eco-friendly products. One area where it’s done the most is laundry detergent. The company recently switched to selling only concentrated laundry detergent in its U.S. stores — these products use up to 50 percent less packaging and require less fuel to transport than the earlier versions. Once again, scale matters: Walmart has a serious carbon footprint, so cutting laundry detergent containers by half can have a big impact.

Walmart has taken steps to combat phosphates, which pollute the water and lead to an explosion of the algae population that destroys fish habitats and plants. The company already says there are no phosphates in detergent it sells in the U.S., and earlier this year, it announced plans to choose more eco-friendly suppliers for the laundry and dish detergent it sells in its Americas region, cutting phosphates by 70 percent by 2011. The Americas region includes Canada, Mexico, and countries in Central and South America..

And Walmart has unveiled broader initiatives to improve its eco-image. In July, the company began developing a sustainability index that will eventually rank all of its suppliers and products based on their environmental impact. “Walmart is taking some important steps, although they’ve still got a long way to go,” says Honor Schauland, a campaign assistant at the Organic Consumers Association, a Minnesota-based consumer advocacy group.

Walmart didn’t become the world’s largest retailer by accident. Executives in Bentonville, Ark., are well aware that stocking sustainable products was a good way to attract a more affluent consumer. And those consumers like low prices on recognizable brands as much as anyone, especially in the current economy, says Doug Conn, a managing director at Hexagon Securities who focuses on the retail sector.

“They have picked up on trends like organics and natural products, and that has helped get new customers,” says Conn. “But the key theme is that customers are more value-oriented than they have ever been this holiday season, and Walmart is the default place to go for low prices.”

In other words, new customers are coming for the deals. But if they shop the categories mentioned above, they can feel good about being thrifty without worrying that they’ve abandoned their ideals just to save a buck.

What Not to Buy at Walmart (by Catherine Holahan)

While Walmart has recently burnished its reputation among upscale shoppers, there are still some product categories where you’d be better off going elsewhere — either because you’re straying beyond Walmart’s core competency, or to avoid supporting the giant retailer’s bad behavior. Here are three of them.

1. High-End Electronics

Though Walmart has expanded its selection of name-brand electronics, it’s still focused on value-oriented products in the sub-$1,000 price range. And its sales staff tend not to be experts in the finer points of multimedia interface. So if you want to splurge on a top-of-the-line television or digital SLR camera — and get the accompanying level of service and accessories — you’ll want to visit a specialty electronics store. Best Buy (BBY), for example, has a customer support team (the Geek Squad) capable of explaining why, for instance, you may need a television with several HDMI ports.

2. Books

This year, Walmart slashed prices aggressively to establish itself as the low-price leader for best-selling books. The store cut the cost of popular novels such as Stephen King’s Under the Dome by 70 percent to $13.99, sparking a price war with Amazon (AMZN).

The Walmart/Amazon rivalry translates into incredibly low prices for consumers on some of the most popular book titles. But Walmart’s prices come at a cost, say local business advocates. In the long-run, such deep discounts can drive independent booksellers out of business. And without these stores, consumers will have difficulty finding all but the most well-known authors, says Stacy Mitchell, senior researcher with the Institute for Local Self-Reliance, a non-profit that advocates for local businesses.

3. Wood Furniture

Despite Walmart’s increased focus on sustainability, the retailer has a long way to go in the furniture category. In December 2007, an environmental group published a report tracing furniture from Walmart suppliers to wood illegally logged in protected Russian habitats for Siberian tigers and other wildlife. Several months later, Walmart promised to investigate its suppliers and joined the Global Forest & Trade Network, an organization dedicated to eliminating illegal logging. Environmental activists have applauded Walmart’s promise to purge environmentally rotten wood, but Walmart could take until a self-imposed deadline of 2013 to phase out the products. Until then, consumers can’t be certain that Walmart’s wood furniture comes from well-managed forests.

Do E-Readers Cause Eye Strain? ( By NICK BILTON, NYTimes)

The admonition offered by legions of mothers — “Don’t sit so close to the TV” — isn’t really an option when it comes to e-reading devices. You have to get close to the screen to use it.


Emmanuel Dunand/Getty Images
Amazon.com’s Kindle with a black-and-white E Ink screen.
The act of reading is going through a number of radical transitions, but perhaps none is more fundamental than the shift from reading on paper to reading on screens. As consumers decide whether to make this jump and which technology to use, one key question is how reading on a screen affects the eyes.

First of all: doctors say that reading on a screen won’t cause any harm.

“Most of what our mothers told us about our eyes was wrong,” said Dr. Travis Meredith, chair of the ophthalmology department at the University of North Carolina, Chapel Hill. “Sitting close to a television, or computer screen, isn’t bad for our eyes. It’s a variety of other factors that can cause physical fatigue.”

For example, the ergonomics of reading screens and the lack of blinking when we stare at them play a big role in eye fatigue. “The current problem with reading on screens is that we need to adjust our bodies to our computer screens, rather than the screens adjusting to us,” Dr. Meredith said.

Still, as regular readers of Bits comments know, there is a lively debate among fans of e-readers and paper books about which type of reading experience is most friendly to the eyes.

It turns out the answer isn’t as black-and-white as we might assume.

Doctors and researchers note that in most instances, paper can offer more visual sophistication than a screen. But certain types of paper, including inexpensive newsprint and the paper in softcover books, can actually provide an inferior reading experience for our eyes than the electronic alternatives.

With e-readers, there are currently numerous display technologies available, from the black-and-white E Ink technology found in Amazon.com’s Kindle and the Barnes & Noble Nook, to the coming full-color IPS LCD display that will come built into Apple’s iPad. And then there’s old-fashioned paper. Does one offer a better reading experience than the others?

Michael Bove, director of the Consumer Electronics Laboratory at the M.I.T. Media Lab, says different screens make sense for different purposes.

“It depends on the viewing circumstances, including the software and typography on the screen,” said Mr. Bove. “Right now E Ink is great in sunlight, but in certain situations, a piece of paper can be a better display than E Ink, and in dim light, an LCD display can be better than all of these technologies.”


Jim Wilson/The New York Times
Apple’s iPad with a full-color LCD display.
E Ink has a very low contrast ratio. Although it can offer an excellent reading experience in bright sunlight, the screens can become uncomfortable to use in dark settings because of the lack of contrast and backlighting on the screen.

LCD screens, meanwhile, have long struggled to offer good viewing angles for reading. Apple’s latest IPS LCD screens include extremely wide viewing angles, but the reflective glass on the screen could be a hindrance in brightly lit situations.

Professor Alan Hedge, director of the Human Factors and Ergonomics Laboratory at Cornell University, said that reducing eye fatigue is less a matter of choosing a specific display than of taking short breaks from looking at the screen.

When we read, Dr. Hedge explained, a series of ocular muscles jump around and can cause strain, regardless of whether we are looking at pixels or paper. “While you’re reading, your eyes make about 10,000 movements an hour. It’s important to take a step back every 20 minutes and let your eyes rest,” he said.

Today’s screens are definitely less tiring to look at than older displays, which refreshed the image much less frequently, causing a flicker. Carl Taussig, director of Hewlett-Packard’s Information Surfaces Lab, said the 120 Hz refresh rate typical of modern screens is much quicker than our eyes can even see.

“The new LCDs don’t affect your eyes,” Mr. Taussig said. “Today’s screens update every eight milliseconds, whereas the human eye is moving at a speed between 10 and 30 milliseconds.”

Mr. Taussig said consumers will pick the type of screen that makes sense on an individual basis. “I don’t think there is a single technology that will be optimum for all the things we want to do with our devices. For example, H.P. sells 65 million displays a year, and they are all used in a different way.”

H1B的申请状态更新

1. Get LCA receipt number

2. Get LCA approval

3. File H1B application

4. Get H1B receipt number

5. Get H1B approval

Revenge! (fwd)

The other day we learned a Google StreetView car buzzed (or was buzzed by?) a well-fed seagull. Today, it would seem one of his countrymen decided to repay the favor. With poop. [Google StreetView - Thanks, Eric]

保护眼睛 -- 改变窗口颜色和Pdf背景颜色

如果常常用电脑很容易导致眼睛过度疲劳而得干眼症，所以大夫建议电脑屏幕不要用白色，因为白色对眼睛的刺激是最大的。像我们这样整天对着电脑，也应该注意一下。其实，只要稍微设置一下，就能让你电脑上的窗口从白花花的颜色变成淡淡的绿色。

设置方法：

右击桌面，选择属性－外观(appearance)－高级(advanced)， 然后在项目(items)那栏选“窗口(windows)”，再点颜色(color)－其它(others)，然后把色调（Hue）设为85，Sat(饱和度)设为90，Lum(亮度)设为205。 然后单击 添加到自定义颜色(Add tocustom colors)，一直确定。


把窗口设成绿色之后，再来把IE的网页背景也变成养眼的绿色吧：
打开IE，点击工具(TOOLS)，点INTERNET选项(INTERNET OPTIONS)，点右下角的辅助功能 (Assessibility)，然后勾选 不使用网页中指定的颜色(这一操作有可能影响网页显示效果！！！)，然后点确定退出。现在你就会发现屏幕已经变成淡淡的绿色了。这个颜色会比白色柔和许多，刚开始可能你还有些不适应,但确实对我们的眼睛有好处,建议大家试一下。


PDF格式背景改变方法如下：
点击 编辑 －》首选项－》辅助工具－》选中“替换文档颜色”和“自定义颜色”－》将背景颜色改成你想要的背景颜色。

New iPad vs Stone...

equalizer相关知识

1.如果声音浑浊，请衰减250hz附近的频段。
2.如果声音听起来有喇叭音，请衰减500hz附近的频段
3.当你试图让声音听起来更好，请考虑用衰减
4.当你试图让声音听起来与众不同，请考虑用提升
5.you can't boost something that's not there in the first place

31hz 隆隆声，闷雷在远处隆隆作响。感觉胸口发闷。
65hz 有深度，所谓“潜的很深”
125hz 隆隆声，低沉的，心砰砰直跳。温暖。
250hz 饱满或浑浊
500hz 汽车喇叭声
1khz 重击声
2khz 咬碎东西的声音，踩的嘎啦啦作响。
4khz 镶边，锋锐感
8khz 高频哨声或齿音，轮廓清晰，“ouch!”
16khz 空气感

一些常用频点的作用
50hz，这是我们常用的最低频段，这个频段就是你在的厅外听到的强劲的地鼓声的最重
要的频段，也是能够让人为之起舞的频点。通过对它适当的提升，你将得到令人振奋的
地鼓声音。但是，一定要将人声里面所有的50hz左右的声音都切掉，因为那一定是喷麦
的声音。

70～100hz，这是我们获得浑厚有力的BASS的必要频点，同时，也是需要将人声切除的
频点。记住，BASS和地鼓不要提升相同的频点，否则地鼓会被掩没掉的。

200～400hz，这个频段有如下几个主要用途，首先是军鼓的木质感声音频段；其次，这
是消除人声脏的感觉的频段；第三，对于吉它，提升这个频段将会使声音变的温暖；第
四、对于镲和PERCUSSION，衰减这个频段可以增加他们的清脆感。其中，在250hz这个
频点，对地鼓作适当的增益，可以使地鼓听起来不那么沉重，很多清流行音乐中这样使
用。

400～800hz，调整这个频段，可以获得更加清晰的BASS，并且可以使通鼓变得更加温暖
。另外，通过增益或衰减这个频段内的某些频点，可以调整吉它音色的薄厚程度。

800～1khz，这个频段可以用来调整人声的“结实”程度，或者用于增强地鼓的敲击感
，比较适用与舞曲的地鼓。

1k～3khz，这个频段是一个“坚硬”的频段。其中，1.5k~2.5k的提升可以增加吉它或
BASS的“锋利”的感觉；在2～3k略作衰减，将会使人声变得更加平滑、流畅，否则，
有些人的声音听起来唱歌象打架，你可以利用这样的处理来平息演唱者的怒气！反过来
，在这个频段进行提升也会增加人声或者钢琴的锋利程度。呵呵。总的来说，这个频段
通常被成为噪声频段，太多的话，会使整个音乐乱成一团，但在某种乐器上适当的使用
，会使这种乐器脱颖而出。

3k～6khz，声音在3k的时候，还是坚硬的，那么，不用我说，大家也知道该作什么了吧
。至于6k，提升这个频点可以提升人声的清晰度，或者让吉它的声音更华丽。

6k～10khz，这个频段可以增加声音的“甜美”感觉。并且增加声音的空气感，呼吸感
。并可增加吉它的清脆声音（但要注意，一定不要过量使用）。PERCUSSION、军鼓和大
镲都可以在这个频段里得到声音的美化。并且，弦乐和某些的合成器综合音色，可以在
这个频段得到声音的“刀刃”的感觉（我实在不知道该怎么形容这样的声音）。

10k～16khz，提升这个频段会使人声更加华丽，并且能够提升大镲和PERCUSSION的最尖
的那个部分?。但是，需要注意的是，你一定要首先确认这个频段内是有声音存在的，
否则的话，你所增加的肯定是噪声

Mazda Protege 99 cd机接口针脚定义

Mazda Protege 99 cd机接口针脚定义
PIN	Signal name	Function
1	NC	Not used
2	TNS	Unknown (something to do with dimming lamps?)
3	BATT	Constant 12V power.
4	ACC	12V DC when Key is in accessory mode
5	D-GND	Data Ground (for use with BUS pin #13)
6	AUX-O	Unknown (Let me know if you know about this)
7	L-IN	Left audio input
8	R-IN	Right audio input
9	NC	Not used
10	-ILL	Controls panel illumination. No connection for bright, increased voltage dims the panel light.
11	MUTE	Input - Connect this to Pin#3 and the speakers are muted.
12	P-GND	Power ground
13	BUS	Data bus for communicating with CD Changer
14	AUX-I	Input - When connected to Pin#4 the line inputs are selected
15	SET-C	Unknown (Let me know if you know about this)
16	S-GND	Signal ground for audio inputs

American Idol 2010 Schedule

Tuesday, Jan. 12 (8:00-10:00 PM) Season Premiere, Part 1 Boston Auditions Episode

Wednesday, Jan. 13 (8:00-9:15 PM) Season Premiere, Part 2 Atlanta Auditions Episode

Tuesday, Jan. 19 (8:00-9:00 PM) Chicago Auditions Episode

Wednesday, Jan. 20 (8:00-9:00 PM) Orlando Auditions Episode

Tuesday, Jan. 26 (8:00-9:00 PM) Dallas Auditions Episode

Wednesday, Jan. 27 (9:00-10:00 PM) Los Angeles Auditions Episode

Tuesday, Feb. 2 (8:00-9:00 PM) Denver Auditions Episode

Wednesday, Feb. 3 (9:00-10:00 PM) "The Road to Hollywood" Auditions Episode

Tuesday, Feb. 9 (8:00-9:00 PM) Hollywood Round, Part 1

Wednesday, Feb. 10 (9:00-10:00 PM) Hollywood Round, Part 2

Tuesday, Feb. 16 (8:00-9:00 PM) Hollywood Round, Part 3

Wednesday, Feb. 17 (9:00-10:00 PM) Hollywood Round, Part 4 Top 24 Semifinalists Announced

Tuesday, Feb. 23 (8:00-10:00 PM) Top 12 Female Semifinalists Perform

Wednesday, Feb. 24 (8:00-10:00 PM) Top 12 Male Semifinalists Perform

Thursday, Feb. 25 (8:00-9:00 PM) First Results Show (ET live/PT tape-delayed) Two Male and Two Female Contestants Eliminated

Tuesday, March 2 (8:00-10:00 PM) Top 10 Female Semifinalists Perform

Wednesday, March 3 (8:00-10:00 PM) Top 10 Male Semifinalists Perform

Thursday, March 4 (8:00-9:00 PM) Results Show (ET live/PT tape-delayed) Two Male and Two Female Contestants Eliminated

Tuesday, March 9 (8:00-9:00 PM) Top 8 Female Semifinalists Perform

Wednesday, March 10 (9:00-10:00 PM) Top 8 Male Semifinalists Perform

Thursday, March 11 (8:00-9:00 PM) Results Show (ET live/PT tape-delayed) Two Male and Two Female Contestants Eliminated; Finalists Revealed

Tuesday, March 16 (8:00-10:00 PM) Finalists Perform (ET live/PT tape-delayed)

Wednesday, March 17 (9:00-10:00 PM) Results Show (ET live/PT tape-delayed) One Contestant Eliminated

王菲 <幽兰操>下载 - 电影<孔子>主题曲

地址： http://www.rayfile.com/files/865eec6b-fa91-11de-944d-0014221b798a/

如何利用Google Books Downloader在Google Books下载图书

首先下载Google Books Downloader:
http://www.softpedia.com/progDownload/Google-Book-Downloader-Download-112996.html
安装后运行，选择File->Add book...，出现如图对话框（点击放大），在上面的条形框输入书名，book code 或 isbn等信息，点Queue加入下载队列，如果下载没有开始，右键点击下载项选Start即可。

炒饭诀窍 (转自sbazu)

先打好蛋，蛋里一定要加油，热锅，下冷饭，炒到半干身，然后倒入一半的蛋液，不停的翻炒，在蛋液的帮助下，饭粒会分开，然后再放下另一半的蛋液，也是快速的翻炒，可以的话最好可以抛锅，最后就可以炒出金包银的效果，后一半的翻炒时间可以自己控制，想干的可以久一点，我判断的时间是锅边的饭粒可以不停的跳动就好，然后最后才下葱花，这样葱花的香味会更突出而不会发闷，而且葱花的颜色可以保持得很翠绿。还有，炒饭炒菜，分量少的话，就好处理，一次3碗左右的饭就够了，再多的话，饭的水分难散失，很难炒得好。

先把冷饭用手捏散，之所以用手，是因为手比较好控制，不会把饭弄断，还可以感觉饭的湿度。然后就热锅，下冷油，油稍热就下饭。蛋液我会下盐糖，也会下一点点味精，最重要是下油，这样之后炒起来会容易很多。然后最后快起锅的时候，再下盐和糖来调一次味。至于其他配料如虾仁之类的，都是单独炒好的，然后最后的时候一起下。